I am fond of blokes with tight arses, something to grab on and spank until it blushes. It turns me on when I can sink my fingers and be given permission to use my teeth too. I'm cheeky and old, I could get away with it.

Whenever a lad hits up on me and asks me where I came from, I always tell them I came from a floating island in Gulliver's Travels. They laugh. Those little bastards don't know it's Laputa. Guess I'll have to change my address, whaddya think?

Being here doesn't mean I'm all fur coat and no knickers. I'm not all about sleeping with men who show interest in me. I'm here cos I like having great chats with good-looking lads. We can talk about goals, travelling, food, fashion and other topics ...

Aside from a hot hanky panky session, I also want to have a steamy leg over as soon as possible. I've been deprived of a lad's touch for several months now and I think my sexual desires and carnal needs are starting to be unmanageable already.

The kind of lad that I am trying to find is someone who knows a woman's body as if it's the back of his hand. I want to interact with a lad who does not need coaching when it comes to pleasuring a woman's body. If you are that kind of lad, let me kno...

Playing tennis was a way for me to release tension for years. Nowadays, I am often disappointed that it doesn't give me the same thrill anymore. Maybe fucking a dipstick would make me feel better, maybe those of the younger variety will do.